I hear many people discuss how selfishness leads to greed, or that being greedy is part of being selfish. I just have to say that “greed” and “egoism” are not the same thing. These are “value words” and are based on ideas and information instilled in our heads when we were younger as something known as “basic morals.”

As you grow and change, you find that these value words don’t seem to fit anymore, and instead of providing a foundation from which we can learn, they begin to hinder progress. If you learned that being selfish means doing nothing for others and that selfishness is bad, then all your life you will be taken advantage of and used by those who have realized that it is okay to be selfish with yourself.

However, this basic idea of ​​selfishness preempts the definition of love. What this means is that if we are selfish with ourselves, we can never love. This is also false! If we are selfish with ourselves, we look for what is right and true for us. In this search, we can find that person who is right for us and we love her because she gives us the feelings we seek for satisfaction.

Greed is a feeling for materialistic “things.” Egoism is a feeling for oneself.

In today’s society, we have many incorrect ideas hammered into our heads by “parental voices” that condemn and sponsor us into submission. When we begin to love ourselves and live for ourselves, we associate that feeling with the negative connotation of selfishness.

Redefine the meanings of your value words. Don’t just accept a word of value as an absolute because it comes from someone else who feels they “have it all under control.” While they may have it all under control in one area of ​​their life that you see, they may be in crisis in some other area of ​​their life. Learn to redefine and trust your own values ​​based on your own ability to reason.